When It’s Over, It’s Just Over

Photo source: www.artwallpaperhi.com/Paintings/brush/broken_screen_1920x1080_wallpaper_9578

Especially when no amount of time and effort or pleading and saving can bring back what is lost.

Twenty three young years may not give me the credibility to say what I’m about to say, but I will anyway. Relationships, all kinds of them, can end. It might be the one you have with your lover, friend, or even your sibling or parent. And there is nothing you can do about it, except to love or respect the person from afar and painfully remember the time you thought what you had was good for a lifetime.

This is not a breakup post, but it feels like one.

For years, I’ve lost quite a number of cherished friends. I already imagined ourselves having each other’s backs through ups and downs, and being at each other’s weddings or at our children’s birthday parties. Then before I know it, it’s over. We may have fought or just grew apart but the thing is, our friendship’s over, like a movie with a tragic ending or a mirror reduced to shards. To say it is sad is an understatement; it’s like a needle repeatedly piercing through the skin, gently then forcefully, until it leaves nothing but blood and pain. You might say I’m just being melodramatic, but I see friends as more than buddies to call when you want to talk over pretentious designer coffee or bad-tasting beer to catch up. For me, friends are like siblings you can celebrate your triumphs with and depend on during your failures. Unfortunately, there are people I see this way but see me otherwise. Or maybe they just forgot that they actually have me for a friend. Either way, it just fucking hurts.

To whoever is going through the same thing right now (as sick as it sounds, I honestly hope I’m not the only one), here’s what I have to say: accept the reality and move on. That friend of yours is not coming back, and he/she does not intend to do so. He/she has moved on from you, so return the favor. Make new friends and make things work this time. If these new frienships end as well, fuck ‘em, it’s perfectly fine. You don’t need to put yourself through such misery to save something that doesn’t even want to be saved. Instead, be a better person for those who will be there for you no matter what.

Oh, it feels so good to finally let this all out.